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“Gokon hasn’t even began and I wanna go home already”
The list of 20 gokon that makes you wanna leave even before it starts:

  1. More than half of the members of the opposite sex are late (100%)
  2. The members of the opposite sex are clearly bored (89.5%)
  3. The food served in the restaurant is not good (73.5%)
  4. The participants are quiet and boring even from the beginning of the gokon, the self-introduction (72.9%)
  5. There is no one attractive or interesting (71.3%)
  6. There are 1-2 weirdos creating awkward atmosphere (70%)
  7. The number of participants for male and female team are unbalanced, too many guys/girls (69.8%)
  8. The members of the opposite sex are ALL married (69.8%)
  9. All participants are snobbish (68.8%)
  10. The members of the opposite sex ALL have boyfriend/girlfriend (66.6%)
  11. The conversation does not flow (66.4%)
  12. The gokon starts out in karaoke bar (65.6%)
  13. Wide age gap between the participants (64.6%)
  14. So different from expectation ( 62.8%)
    Usually, the participants receive brief information about the participating members of the opposite sex team. (i.e., age, appearance, work place, marital status,…)
  15. The gokon venue is chain restaurant (57.9%)
  16. The guys are drinking like crazy (49.2%)
  17. Everyone else, but me, is very dressed up (43.1%)
  18. My ex is there! (38.7%)
  19. By the time I get there, there were people already coupling up (35.4%)
  20. Sitting next to colleague/friend (26.3%)

As I thought, tardiness of the members are clearly unmotivating for the start of the gokon. Tardiness, is followed by “clearly bored members,” which I haven’t seen yet in my previous experience, but I have seen some Japanese guys who cannot start an interesting conversation with the girls and just talk among themselves without making the effort.

But I am surprised to see “There is no one attractive or interesting” on the #5 of the list! Food (#3) matters more than attractive interesting boys/girls? This shows that, Japanese people don’t go to gokon searching exclusively for instant attraction with “the one.” As the list indicates, people go to gokon, looking for nice company, fun conversation, good food and drink! Gokon is more of a place to have fun, than a place to meet “the man of the dreams” or “the future ideal girlfriend”


The survey was conducted in April 2008, by goo
Source: http://ranking.goo.ne.jp/ranking/017/compa_evade/

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What is Tokyo Meet Market?

From the Western perspective, what goes on in the Japanese dating scene is really different and interesting! In this shy nation of Japan, meeting new people is almost institutionalized, dating and romance is littered with conventions that protect people from social awkwardness. What are dating conventions and rules in Japan? How do the shy Japanese people meet new people, develop affection, and express their passion? As I research and answer these question, I will write a real time report of what's going on in the Tokyo dating scene, or the "Tokyo Meet Market" here in this blog. I hope you enjoy my blog and a trip around Tokyo Meet Market with me!

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